Seven New Ways to Be Politically Incorrect

Try these ways to have fun!

 1. I pranked my asshole racist friends who think as a white man I must be like them. When they invited me to a KKK rally, I wore a black sheet.

 2. If you cannot be a good athlete, be an athletic supporter.

  

3. Call a suicide hotline and tell whoever answers that you decided life is still worth living, as long as you can stay with them. Ask their address and also if they can pay the taxi fare to the cab driver when you arrive. When they resist, say “OK. I guess I have to go ahead and jump.” Then scream as if you really did jump and hang up.

 4. The next time you go to a restaurant pay with your credit card and then sign the bill as Johnny Depp. You may get away with this for months before anyone questions it at all. If someone asks about your signature, say “I know the plastic surgeon really fucked up! And they spelled my fuckin’ name wrong on these damn credit cards too.” Then storm out of the place.  (Note: It is not illegal to sign your own legitimate credit cards and bills anyway you like.)

 5. Wear this costume to all parties you go to …

…and force all of your friends to call you “The Donald.”  Tell them to look down your pants. Then say, “If you play with it; it’s going to be HUGE, believe me.” Then say, “I promised to bring more jobs back to America – blowjobs! Grab the nearest pussy and get back to work.” Make America Hard Again.

6. Do your part to fight the evil spread of socialism. Cancel your Facebook account and stop sending me those annoying updates about photos of your butt-ugly baby that you think is oh so cute.

7. In the Spanish language, we have this wonderful,  beautiful, poetic phrase "Chinqadera Trump!" 

It is so down-to-earth, so true, and so pure. Just look up chingadera to see the meaning.

Understanding America's Problems is Easy as 1 - 2 - 3!

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